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Married Again

Married Again

Berta, Frank, Me, Kathy, Gina and her boyfriend

Kathy and I had returned to California after our successful visit to New York where she met my family. Now back, it was time to plan our wedding. Getting married was not new to either of us as we'd both been married before. Neither of us needed or wanted a formal fancy wedding. We picked a date in April, which was just a couple of months away. Kathy and I found a place in Sausalito to make rings for us. Kathy found a dress she liked and told me she would like to pick out what I was going to wear and I mostly let her.


Getting married wasn't new but having a wedding and reception was going to be new for me. The first time I got married I married Donna at the home of a local Justice of the Peace. We called his number to confirm he was available. The person who answered told us to come to his house in a couple hours. We didn't dress up. We didn't even have rings. We just used a couple of rings we already had for the ceremony. A couple of girls Donna knew from her dorm came with us to act as witnesses. When we arrived at the house his wife answered the door and let us in. She excused herself to fetch her husband who evidently was sleeping. He married us in 5 minutes, maybe less. We paid him the fee and left. For the reception, we walked over to a little place just off campus (Valparaiso University) for soda and pizza. Heck, our best friends couldn't even make it as they had classes. So although our plans were not going to be elaborate, for me having a wedding and reception was something new and different.


Kathy was still living in the Bay Area and that's where we were going to have the ceremony and reception. She was making most of the arrangements since I was working up in Sacramento. She called me nightly to give me an update and get my thoughts. About a week before the wedding I got this nagging feeling that maybe I shouldn't be doing this but all the plans were in place. While this was going to be my second marriage, it was going to be the first time my parents would witness me getting married. My parents were set to fly out from New York in a couple of days and my good friend Frank from Eugene was coming down to be my best man. I had disappointed everyone before by backing out of an engagement and no one was happy with me at the time, but that was an engagement I never wanted in the first place. Even so, that hadn't been easy even if it was the right thing to do. This wasn't exactly the same though as I'd been on-board and happy about this. It wasn't until just now that I was feeling some doubts. I concluded that I was just nervous, and maybe having had one marriage end in divorce I was feeling a little apprehensive this time.


My parents arrived in Sacramento. We visited the Capitol, Old Sacramento, and even went over to Sutter's Fort. I offered to take them to my personal favorite Sacramento attraction, Tower Records, but they did not show much enthusiasm. So we skipped it. That was pretty much all there was to do in Sacramento in 1980, or at least that was all I knew. The day before the blessed event we drove down to San Francisco as the wedding activities were about to begin.

My Mom and Dad - Kathy's Aunt, Grandmother, Mother, and Father

Kathy and I had booked a room at the Miyako Hotel (now Kabuki) on Post in San Francisco. On “the' day, a Justice of the Peace married us in Kathy's parent's living room in Daly City with our immediate families, our friends, Bride's Maid Gina and Best Man Frank, and their significant others. The ceremony was small and simple but longer than 5 minutes. We then had a lavish reception to which we invited all our friends as well as family. The reception was held in a community hall. (It looked like a school cafeteria.) We had genuine paper table clothes and deluxe plastic tableware. We provided the “Champaign”, of bottled beer (Miller), soda, and bottled water. The food was simple but home made! Yes, you could say we went all out. Kathy's whole family attended the reception but only my Mom and Dad attended from my family. Of course all my family lived on the East Coast. My sister and brother had other things going on in their lives and the expense to travel across the country was a bit too much, and heck, this wasn't my first time. However, all of my good friends from the Bay Area showed up.

Cutting the Cake

After all the festivities we had dinner with my parents before Kathy and I returned to our room at The Miyako. The next day we left town for a short honeymoon out on the coast that included a stay in Mendocino. This was the first time I'd been to the town of Mendocino. It was the only time Kathy and I went there together but I would eventually return. It would become a regular coastal getaway for me. Kris and I have spent a few days there every year we've been together. Whoops, I hope I haven't just spoiled the story of me and Kathy for you....


Upon our return we moved Kathy up to Sacramento. My office, the GBS office, had recently re-located from 555 Capitol Mall to a new office building off Bradshaw just south of 50. Kathy and I found a duplex nearby in the Rosemont area and we moved in. It had two bedrooms and a fenced off yard which I wanted for my dog Nyshia. Kathy left her position with GBS and found a job in a small marketing firm in Old Sac. A new chapter of my life was beginning. I was happy with Kathy and happy with my job but I was not all that thrilled with being in Sacramento. However, I had to admit it was nice being close to the mountains and still not so far from San Francisco that we couldn't go down for the day.


I was now married again. Kathy and I had a place close to my work with a nice yard for my dog Nyshia. I was happy and everything seemed to be going well.


 

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